I have numerous thoughts running through my mind. I feel that this will be a best way to record the frequent blossoming of ideas in my mind..
The way I lived life and The way to live:
I was with full of unnecessary positive energy, aiming at stupid stuffs.. setting unnecessary targets, full of selfish and jealous thoughts.
We all know that "Life is Game to be Played".
but it has to be understood "what game it is and how to play it".
Every book says "Life is a game" and ask us " to play as it comes"..It sometimes motivates to "Play it Big"..
all those stuffs are correct. I was playing a game as advised by others. Those 
advisers left me unclear. So, thinking whatever I know is all that to be known, I played my game.
I played a game similar to "cricket, football, rugby, etc.."...All these games require high energy levels and stamina. They keep us fit and healthy. The 
spectators keep their fingers crossed while watching these games.
But for what?
They look "who win and who loose...!"
These games are always "Win /Loose " games. Either "You win I loose or I win You loose".
What matters for the spectators is who wins..!
Very few enjoy the game.
This is what I played till 2009 April.
I did not enjoy any activity which I did in my life till then. All did was out of unknowing pressure, attitude to win, selfishness and Jealous. I at last won the game. I achieved what I planned. But even after achieving, I was unhappy..
My selfishness and jealous ( I mistook it as aim and determination), kept on creeping to heights.
I substantiated Mas low's Need theory.
My needs kept increasing..After getting at Esteem needs, I started to value my relationships, friendships and even my love lesser than those Esteem needs. I started to investigate about my change in behavior. At last, I found that the drive behind me was to get "recognition" from others. I did not do things out of passion..But did out of the need(want) to get recognized. So, obviously I did not enjoy or the fruits of my success were not tasteful. Now I am happy that I have understood (assuming), the fact that I was more emotional in my life than being rational.
But I realized this at some point, (wondering how), and started to change the way I live. I did some work out of my assumed passion... I also tried to find out "what's my passion"..!!
But after riding the bike for 25 years through my life, I cannot identify my passion...
I was shameful and cannot even say to any one that "I don't have a passion.." But at least I came to know that passion cannot take birth after 25 years.. It must have been tapped right at childhood itself. Now, I just sow the seeds for growing a false tree called "passion". But I never bothered for it because I always had a strong feeling that this false tree will one day reap at least a false fruit, (will be useful for the humanity).
But after April 2009, I started to play a different game.
The game similar to "Golf, Billiards, Swimming..etc"...
Wondering what's the difference and why I chose this particular kind of game?
any guesses..??
These games are also highly reputed and require high energy skills and stamina like football & cricket. But the main difference is:
When a person swims in a race (remember, it is also a competition like football or cricket), he does not even take a moment to look at others. If so he may waste a micro-second, which leads the other swimmers to over take him. They recognize who came first only at the end of the race. On the other hand, we can say that they compete with themselves. 
They race against their own best times..
The same can be applied for the Golfers. They don't even use the same ball like footballers or the cricketers do. They try to reach their best against their own best..
The difference is the golfers or the swimmers play the game in parallel.
So it is always better to play the game of golf instead of 
cricket..Swimming instead of football..
Comments Are Welcome...
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